Loss… Or is it, Victory!!!

So it’s about my friend again. Yes the same one. Well if you haven’t read my last blog, you won’t know who I am talking about. Now you get what to do first…: P

She called me. I thought it was yet another beautiful day for her. Every day is a new gift to be unwrapped for the ones in love. Well, I always felt this way, listening to her stories.

Today was different. She was quiet, disturbed, irritable and sad. She didn’t want to talk. Didn’t want to share. Didn’t want to express all her joys and feelings which usually overwhelmed. Off course feelings overwhelmed today too, but they were all dark and black filled with fear, guilt and doubt. Moreover she sounded abandoned, unheard and REJECTED.

I couldn’t really guess what the matter was, but I knew it was something to do with an important person in her life. Well after me, it was HIM who mattered the most to her. Or maybe, he held that first position by now. I didn’t want to know THE WHAT but THE WHY which was troubling her.  

She broke down. I couldn’t believe it was coming so soon for her. I didn’t know acceptance would cost her so much. I didn’t know her trust was really conditioned all this time. Well and I didn’t know her LUCKY DAY would come to her so soon. I wanted to tell her, nothing’s changed; but how could I? I wanted to tell her, stop crying; but I knew that was the right thing for her. She kept weeping and I kept thinking. She was broke and I was angry. She felt like she’s lost it all and I felt like I’ve gained everything back. Our minds contradicted but our hearts confirmed.

I was scared but I showed strength. She was always my solution seeker. Role reversal was difficult. I made the same mistake as HIM. I asked her WHY. WHY did she love him? She couldn’t answer, but my heart didn’t stop talking to my brain. It said… May be her love was about instant gratification or maybe she deserved some gratefulness to love him more each day. May be her love too was conditioned or maybe it was something beyond. Something unsaid, unheard and unexplained. After all, love is all about understanding. May be they couldn’t be thoughtful enough.

“Your past plays a role creating your present and your future.” She had once told me this. They knew all of it but how about applying and understanding each other when required. That’s what matters. Love is about consistency. May be she gave up easy and soon but may be; they both had to be consistent, not just her.

She couldn’t think enough and I couldn’t stop thinking. 

Was it a loss… or yet another VICTORY?

The Known, Unknown… WHY???

Some conversations don’t end, while some; don’t need to. Some questions have no answers, while some; need NONE.

Well you must be wondering what this puzzle is for and what’s with this WHY. Let me explain.

There’s a young girl, about 6 six years old. Her window is bang opposite mine. We shared looks every day until, one day she smiled back to me. J She eagerly looked at me as if she’s waiting for me to break the ice between us. And I did. Her eyes spoke much more than she did. Her expressions were curious and gestures were inviting. Every time I’m at the window I look for her presence; she does the same. Neither did she have a WHY to ask nor did I care about it. I tag this feeling between us as LOVE. May be temporary, may be far – fetched, may be something which would be forgotten soon, BUT would still stay alive somewhere for life.

I am a teacher and have kids all around all the time. I built a special connect with one of my children over the year. He’s progressed to another class but we meet each day. He makes it a point to come and hug me every day; and on days when I’m lucky enough, he expresses that he loves me too. On days when he doesn’t say anything, I still feel that love in his hug, I see it in his eyes. Do I need to question him WHY?

Love has many forms. I was chatting with a friend of mine about what love really is? I got a distinctive insight to my question. She said, “When it’s love, you won’t really need to ask this.”

May be that 6 year old girl opposite my window and that child in my class know more of love than I do. Because they; want to live the moment, they; don’t care about people around, they; have no fears of future, they; just want to cherish the moment and its they who have taught me to answer to this question WHY. Why is it so important to say I LOVE YOU to the one you really love? It matters. They matter.

Is it just so simple or does it have another angle to it?

A friend of mine is in love. She tried to express many times but failed, is what she feels. Her previous fears started haunting her when she didn’t get a positive go. Well, she didn’t give up and tried to give him time. May be she is pretty sure of him or maybe she just doesn’t care of consequences. She doesn’t want to be judgmental and just enjoy the moment. May be she wants to fight her fears and knows there’s no harm in hoping. Or simply, just like those two little innocent children, she too feels her love would never go. Well, she tells me she’s accepted him the way he is and also believes in destiny. She panicked when he asked her WHY she loves him. She couldn’t reply back instantly. Purity needs no proof. But does it really work that way or even love needs to be conditioned? She’s waiting for her lucky day too.

The answer is so known… yet unknown… WHY does someone love somebody?

May be people want to create memories and cherish them later. Or here, when he may believe in her, or maybe when he may believe in himself. 

HABITSSS !!!

TEAM WORK...!!! The word in itself has so much of positivity in it. Doesn't it? Off course it does. Let us give it a negative angle now. When there are apples kept at distance they all look like juicy and fresh ones, even if one of them has a few spots and dirt on it, it is not noticeable. You see its true colors once u go a little closer and deeper towards it. Similarly team work acts like a mirror to your personality if you really want to inspect yourself. It is the team which makes us realize our faults, those habits of ours which are inseparable from us though they are not welcomed by majority around. We understand how weak we become only because of that one little weakness which we can control but we fail to.

I became a spectator to one such team work and learnt another important lesson about negativity. I don't know how do I manage to, but I always come across certain instances and try to look at its NEGATIVE & POSITIVE aspect. 

There is a very thin line between negative and practical thoughts. We can all think negatively about a situation and get influenced by it quickly, but being practical about the same negative situation is very difficult. The skills lie not in getting carried away by the negative situation but, practically and tactfully solving the same.

So many times we say and do a lot of little things, unaware of the fact that we drag ourselves towards negativity and gloominess. But why do we do this? Nobody enjoys being stressed and dull about situations. I am sure. So then WHY? According to my understanding it is this 5 letter magical word HABIT that makes us think and act in the way we do. Think about hab' IT '. 

Today we have all become so mechanical and monotonous in the way we perform, react to situations, people and events and all little and large things that we have forgotten about that one permanent factor in our lives, CHANGE. Change is one thing we all require from time to time. Negative thoughts do not emerge to a person because he likes them, but because he/she has been acting upon situations in that particular manner since years together now. His/Her nature or character may allow him/her to do so. But i wonder is it not in their control? Can one not manage the way he behaves? I believe YES !!! One just needs the will to perform and its all done.

All the reaction and character and nature that I was talking above really does not decide the wrong and right of a person. Do not mistake me for that. No reaction is wrong and right, its just the state of mind in which the person is at that particular time is what I feel. Emotions take over decisions many times. Or maybe it is just his/her way. But the irony is, whether we are positive or negative people; we could have handled certain situations in a better way than we did. 

Our mind is so biased when we come to ourselves. It can so easily get away by believing in certain things at certain times which it would have never agreed upon at certain other times. Confused? REREAD it please. Here I imply this logic to this simple and oldest phrase that I have ever heard "Old habits die hard." 

Little Moments, Monstrous Memories

MEMORIES !!! So positive and fun this word sounds, doesn't it? Lets go a little deeper into future. I sit on a couch with a cup of coffee sipping away the addictive drink and all the sweet moments flash across my eyes refreshing my mind. I live those moments all over again. Beautiful is what I would term those moments as. Those happy moments are the ones we always recollect when we talk of memories. Our mind automatically filters away the bad ones and focuses on the ones in our favor.  It does not mean bad memories do not exist in our lives. Look at our present, most of us will feel nothing is in place, everything is hay - wire, why me? Isn't it? Then where do these bad moments disappear when we sit and ponder about memories is what I always wonder !!! The happy ones are the ones which rule when we sit at leisure and think of them.

There are several little moments which give us tremendous happiness. Even a call from an unexpected old friend, who's face now appears blurred to you makes you feel happy. A little child smiling and waving back at you brings a smile on your face. Spending a few minutes with someone who loves and cares for you makes us feel happy for him/her. The list goes endless....then why do we still keep our problems on the top of our minds and the solutions are dug up deep below? WHY ???

There are so many little events happening that pull you down & then again so many things just happening at the same time that pull you deeper below and then comes the level of saturation when you sometimes feel like hiding within yourself. But then its just a matter of that one little thing happening and there you go, you pull yourself out of that gravity that kept you stuck inside. Its your own determination that brings you out. At the end of the day its you and only you who can help yourself out of all the negativity. Hang on; this write up is heading towards negative and positive thoughts now !!! Or may be everything is all about the way we think. Everything really revolves around optimism and pessimism. 

One thing is for sure, a perfect moment is a proper blend of the RIGHT ingredients, in a RIGHT proportion at the RIGHT time. So folks keep blending those ingredients and it will turn out the best when the RIGHT TIME strikes. We can't keep waiting for the right time and then start blending, you never know the moment might just skip away. So keep doing your bit and make those little moments the monstrous memories of your life...!!!

 Laughter - The Best Medicine

Haha haha haha !!! Come on now stop showing your Colgate teeth. How much do you really have to laugh; MY GOD... THAT'S ENOUGH !!! This is what I keep hearing when someone tries to laugh their hearts out these days. It sounds familiar, doesn't it?

In our tremendously active schedules today we hardly get the real hours of enjoyment and then what if someone tells you what I mentioned above ? Feel like bashing him/her, yeah? I don't know about you, but I do. They say - Laughter is the Best Medicine and then also try to contradict. Tuff to accept.

There are a few friends who keep saying, "tu kitna hasti hai yaar", "aur koi kaam nahi, hasti rehti hai". To all of them I wanted to say and rest of you I wanted to share my little thought about laughter or maybe my logic about it. 

We really get those few minutes or hours of happiness when we truly laugh out loud, so why miss it? Just grab the opportunity. Its rare, really rare. We face sad moments often, so very often but how many times do we get the chance to express our happiness? We can't even be the real us with anyone and everyone right? Those people are few, those moments are rare when we live to the fullest and enjoy each moment. Do not miss those moments of laughing out loud folks !!! Let people talk, gossip and utter purely nonsensical words about you; but you do not stop your laughter at any cost.

A friend of mine once told me, "Opinions are like assholes, everyone has one." This is so damn true and real. So let us stop bothering about what people talk and start living and laughing our way.

We all have sad and happy moments, memories and maddenned situations in our lives. It all passes by. How boring and irksome our life's would have been if we sat with all those burdens on our heads. Just imagine for yourselves, the times when you cry and need somebody the most people are rarely around you. But when you keep smiling and laughing and giggling and joking people really want to be around you. Isn't it really ironic if we think deep, that we do not really have our loved ones when we need them and vice - versa. 

So I come back to that same Question of mine, Why do we really miss that one chance of laughter only because people think we look mad that way? Uhh !!! or is it cause they are not capable enough of laughing out loud even midst all those unseen loads behind their backs ? They know it best. Well for all of us, let the reason be X Y Z we won't miss all those moments which we could cherish later in life just by LOL !!!

WE ALL FAIL HERE !!!

They say you have changed. But they cannot see who has changed me. They say you were not this before; do they even have mirrors to see through themselves?  Accusing someone of being a different personality is easy but accepting the harsh reality behind that, is what lacks in all of us.  Is CHANGE not the only thing PERMANENT? Does change not happen for the good? Then why not accept change? Why do we fear it? Why?

Relationships break just because people have changed. Considering the facts behind that change is very difficult. Not everyone has the vigor to accept the NEW YOU. Be it any relationship, Change is not welcomed by all and so we don’t have those changed people in our lives anymore. If at all we would have made a little effort to tolerate that change our near and dear ones wouldn’t have vanished from our lives; give it a thought and you’ll know.

How self centered can we really be to misunderstand the other person? The other person may not be an XYZ but the closest one you had once upon a time. One miscommunication, one assumption, one wrong thought and its all gone forever. Is this all really worth it?  Can we not give in a little bit of our EGOs our full minds and openly our Heads and Hearts to someone so close? Receiving is the key guys. Learning to receive is the most difficult part for us when we all think of ourselves as Einsteins and Newtons. But even they would have heard suggestions and recommendations from hundreds of people and then got to their goals. Then why can’t we surrender to JUST HEAR IT OUT. Only listening to the other side is not enough; absorbing, understanding and then trying to digest is the key.

I don’t know how many of you have lost their near and dear ones due to misunderstanding, but guys it’s not worth it. So get up, go and talk your heart out. Remember that talking it out is really easy but listening to the talking person will help you maintain relations.

GOODLUCK !!!

Beautiful realization

I will be THE BEST PERFORMER today. I will just make it happen. Aaj toh karke hi rahungi main..!!! Don't we say this quite often? Every time... every time something big or small has to be achieved we gratify ourselves by saying this. I do it too. It gives me positivity, strength and vigor to go achieve what I want. But a lot of times, few incidents contradict those theories you believe in; that are time tested and worse happens when those unbelievably new theories for you; are also supported by equally good tests. haha !!! CONFUSED??? Happens, even i was by observing what I did !!! Let me share with you...

I strongly believed in "you can make and break your own destiny", contradicting to a lot others who say "wahi hota hai jo hona hai". If we strongly visualize our dreams we will indeed achieve it is what my BELIEF is, which is real. It does happen. It has happened to me. Recently a dwarfish but thought provoking incident made me ponder over my strong belief. It actually tried to drift away, what is in my hands. I had a presentation for which I was not that well prepared but confident enough to speak right. Everything was going great, though we had prepared for the presentation in just a day's time our entire presentation flew smoothly until I stepped on the stage. I too presented well, grabbing everybody's attention; until my last minute was left to conclude, when a sudden arrival of non stop coughing which lasted for about 4 minutes attacked upon me but departed the same way as it came (It got Chhoomantar with a blink of an eye). Then when I spoke, I experienced my voice(which was absolutely normal few minutes back and after the incident) to sound like some ghost, a soft ghost who has lost its capacity to scare people. I could not regain my original voice for about 5 minutes. The best cold drink ever - Water could not help me at that moment. What was it that really occurred then? I could not even control my own Body. Nothing could stop or alter that bizarre happening there in front of 30 other students. Where did my " Everything is in my hands " disappear??? I was wondering. Was that really destined to mess up the Best Presentation of the day? OR may be not? (cause we still got that honor of the best presentation for the day). It remains obscure for me to deduce what really happened.

How confident we all are when we say I will surely be able to change this person into someone better or here in my case be the best speaker of the day (which I could achieve irrespective of that days coughing session, haha !!!); but is it all REALLY completely in our hands? I am skeptical about it now. I definitely can never stop thinking positive about situations and things but now I know along, I also have to be prepared for something unforeseen along with that. Miniscule incidents sometimes get you to think the way you would have never thought before. The thought about thinking the new way would really be destined !!! Who knows??? :O 

Its really unsettled for me, a mystery unsolved...!!! Hope someone comes up with a REAL solution to this someday soon.

Luck, Fate and Hard work

"I am working hard, very very hard but I really cannot see results !!! I have got such a bad luck yaaa...Mera toh nasib hi kharab hai !!!" Sounds familiar? Doesn't it ???

Are these terms synonyms in this case or are they supporting words (I don't know whether this term exists) but they always do support each other in a conversation like this one. I work and work and work and work and still do not get the desired results. I call this situation BADLUCK along with unfortunate FATE because of which all my HARDWORK goes in vain. But how many of us have racked our brains behind the real reason of things not happening in our favor?

Its very easy to just Blame the LUCK and FATE for our FAILURES, isn't it? All our Frustration, Bitter experiences and Anger make us feel so. We should if not anything else at least have the confidence in our Hard work !!! If things are not falling in place its just a matter of time and everything will be in its right place. PATIENCE is the key to Success. Why do we blame the external factors for; our intention not being strong enough? May be our dreams are not strong enough for the Universe to hear them and work towards them. Make your Dreams stronger and look how things will be in your court. BELIEVE a little harder and opportunities will await you. Keep working towards them each day and you will see your Dreams getting closer to you each day.

"Easy said than done," isn't it? I feel it should have been "Easy said if done." People have done it. They have made it happen, then why not we? I can talk about it today because i have made it happen. I have made a few of my little dreams come true and I am sure the Big ones will soon fall in place too. Achieving a Dream may not always be a Big House or a Magnificent Car, it may be as little as finally having that peaceful relationship with your brother to as huge as having that same peaceful relation with your neighbor (which i am sure is a task these days, specially in Bombay). But don't people make it happen? Yes they do. Pure intention works for them.

Should we still believe that Luck and Fate rule our Hard work? Then why does this question always remain unanswered "Even after so much of effort why don't I succeed?" We have one statement to make us all feel good at this situation, "Everything happens for a good reason." So be patient and everything will fall in place gradually.

People and Experiences: This Blog was created long longback...all the way...

People and Experiences:
This Blog was created long longback...all the way...: This Blog was created long long back...all the way back in 2010...but it remains just a BLOG CREATED with no posts on it completely...I ...

This Blog was created long long back...all the way back in 2010...but it remains just a BLOG CREATED with no posts on it completely...I truly believe that there are some people who can just write all the time and a few like me who really need a strong reason to write...

That "ONE CHAT"

Meeting friends, hanging out with them, cracking jokes and laughing our asses out; doesn't it connect to all of us? In fact some of our favorite memorable moments may have these visuals. 

Life after Facebook is also more or less similar, because "Kaunsa mai ka lal can stop us from hanging around with friends?" so why blame Facebook? We as Humans have always been playing the Blame Game, but how long? Its high time we start enjoying whatever's given to us. Another angle of it could be taken into consideration. Now that Facebook exists we can stay connected all the more. Isn't it? Its your choice my friends, either look at the brighter side of  it or curse it for its existence (which will not really make it disappear from our life's). Will it?

We chat with friends on Facebook, but how many times does that chat makes real sense? Or is it just HEY WASSUP ??? which seems the most annoying question to me on Mother Earth. How the hell is one even supposed to answer that question? You must be wondering I started with a compelling reason that made me start Blogging. So searching for that reason in this write up? You're almost there friends. 

I kind of bumped into this friend of mine from class, who isn't much of a friend but more of a classmate sort on Facebook. Started talking, but din't really have much to chat other than college projects and general questions like " had lunch, so wats up?" These questions don't really seem adequate for people whom you've hardly spoken to. But we are used to it now. Aren't we?

An interesting topic came up while we were trying to know each other, which was about our DREAMS !!! I do not generally share this with random people, I often chose people worth sharing this kind of important DATA. But there was something about her. I shared mine, she told me hers. She had a Beautiful one but all without the confidence of achieving it. I learnt a lesson while listening to her, " No Dream is big or small, good or bad but its just the attitude that you have to accomplish it."  I wanted to make her realize this very fact, I don't know for what reason but she felt special. A someone who would definitely achieve it all. 

What the other person may feel of their-selves may not always matter, sometimes what you think of the other person may change the way that person looks at themselves. CONFUSED??? It does make sense...

Talking to someone and giving them the confidence may be the ultimate thing they need in life. You never know. That one chat was actually nothing to me because its my habit to be inspiring, but it may change her life. Who knows? It may be a turning point of her life, it may be all that she needed, it may be just that one person who believes in her DREAMS or it may also be that one kick start to make her realize her DREAM. Whatever it is, it will always be on a positive thought process, because you are POSITIVE. You never know that person may completely change because of that one chat with you and achieve great heights, but wherever he/she may reach they will always remember that "ONE CHAT" 

Achieving all the unmet DREAMS !!!